Why You Need A Divorce Coach
In every marriage, you’d agree with me that certain ups and downs are inevitable. When you consider marriage takes mutual, conscious, and deliberate efforts of both parties, it becomes frustrating that you are the only one putting in the most effort to keep your marriage alive.
Why is this the case? How do you ascertain what’s best for you in this devastating situation? Well, those answers are what you find in this article, so join us.
WHO BELONGS IN YOUR MARRIAGE?
Kissing and telling may be for immature people, nevertheless, is it as popular as we are accustomed to believing?
There are only two people in a relationship of love. Even in a customary polygamous union, there are only two parties treading the path of conjugal love.
Telling your friends or family about the struggles you face in your marriage means you are granting them needless permission to have an opinion about your life and how you live it with your partner.
It is an act of willingly putting your fears, insecurities, reservations, and vulnerabilities in public glare. Yes, public glare, because there’s no guarantee the person you’re telling won’t tell another person.
There’s a Latin maxim that says “Nemo dat quod non-habet” which means “no one gives what he has not”. It goes to say that, even with the best intentions toward you and your marriage, outsiders can only give advice from their own perspective.
And most times their perspectives are flawed because they only know what’s on the surface and not the emotional and psychological depth of attachment existing between you and your partner.
Could you be disrespecting the intimacy and sacredness of your relationship when you tell a third party?
I know you don’t mean to, rather, you are trying to get what you think is the perspective of someone else – probably someone more advanced, more experienced, or even more solution-oriented.
That’s like looking at it from the person’s lenses and expecting it works for you, as though you were the person. Does that really help? But you have to understand the following key points about the person you are complaining to:
- The person is not emotionally attached, you are.
- It’s not the person who has to live or stay in the relationship, you are.
- Such a person is not trained to help you through this difficult period.
- At best, that person can advise you from the head and not heart knowledge. Your relationship may be similar, but it’s different from their experience.
You might be wondering what purpose you can achieve with support groups. Telling the stories of your struggles, repeatedly, keeps you stuck in the pain, the facts, the memories, and the trauma.
It takes you to a place you should not be, you may start to wonder why you didn’t stay with the previous lover before this one.
It takes you to a place of regret, and tears at your personal space, confidence, and growth. You feel compelled because you see them as a prop.
Support groups are cool if they offer an avenue for each hurting soul to heal from other people’s healing process, and challenge each other’s thinking as it relates to struggles.
It is not a place to pester your partner, else the essence is lost. It’s a place to share your experiences, draw motivation, and grow through your pains.
If there is a recurring problem in your marriage, then seek help from someone who is trained to help you. That’s what I do. More voices are not better, they are noisy, and far from professional coaching.
Failure to make a decision is itself a bad decision. It is like deciding to sit in mire and confusion. It is like sitting in one spot because you feel frozen. It is a decision to freeze your life and emotions to death.
When you work with me, I help you to gradually see the light. I can because I am trained to help you see the light just the exact way you should see it. Because beyond everything else, you are the one that will see the light and become free from all emotional impediments.
Imagine traveling at night with your car headlamps on, and giving you a clear view of a few feet ahead, just enough to drive forward. That’s what I do – giving you a clear view of the next move in your relationship based on my expertise.
I don’t promise that you will see the end at the start of the journey, but I promise that if you do as you are told, you will get a better perspective of your break up and how to move forward.
Note that forward may be returning to what was once a messy predicament. It’s called cleaning up, forward into a restored relationship, or into new singleness.
So who belongs in your marriage? Both of you assisted by a coach to guide you as you stay wonderfully glued-up or happily separated.
I coach you to make the decision and save yourself the gradual destruction that comes with living in your mire.
With me, you’d grab the various stages of your grief, as well as strategies to cope, survive, and thrive in the midst of whatever reality.
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I talk and lead you in taking the best decisions regarding your personal essence and how to love yourself first.
We talk about the place of forgiveness starting with self-forgiveness because, without it, you just might be running around in circles.
We start with establishing what’s on your plate and what is most important to you through your grief period.
By the time you have read this, itching to work with me, you would understand how we can get you out of that divorce path, after which you would be proud to share with your friends in similar situations.
As an added bonus, you get to tap into my knowledge as a lawyer for many years, even though I do not give legal advice. You can take my wealth of knowledge to the bank or cross-check with your legal adviser.
WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO WORK WITH ME?
To work with me, you have to be sure you are ready to heal.
You have to be convenient with dropping all the misconceptions filtered into your subconsciousness about breakups and divorces.
Finally, you have to choose your well-being, growth, happiness, and success inside or outside of your marriage.
If that’s the case, then click here to get the professional assistance you need.
Whether you stay or leave your marriage is for you to decide, but you need to be armed with the right facts and knowledge for you to make the better decision.
Most people you share your issues with don’t understand the process of getting you to make an informed decision that you’ll be proud of all the days of your life. But I do.
That’s why I advise that you take that bold step today so you can be free.