Marriage Vows: What Do They Mean To You?
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Do you remember when you made your marriage vows? The day you vowed to love your spouse till death do you part. You would have been so much in love and have plans for a life of happy moments surrounded by family looking forward to reaching old age together. Many times it doesn’t happen. It doesn’t last till death puts you apart. You have hitches on the way and you both do not really care any longer about those vows. … Read More

What is Divorce all About?
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I get to talk to a lot of people who admit their marriages are in deep trouble, who wish to move on with their lives, but would rather keep the issue of divorce on the back burner. Many there are who believe that going to see a lawyer signifies the end of the marriage. Many are afraid to reach that stage and who rather hide behind what a pastor said or what the holy books say. When you ask them … Read More

An omelette is only as good as the eggs
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Watch the expiry date on your eggs cause they are for real. That presupposes you aren’t to buy from the corner shop down your road; the Mallam who ekes a living from the necessaries you run out of, or indeed the woman who apes Mallam’s business to enable her to ensure her kids remain in school. It’s really about eggs and what have to do in a marriage that’s my concern. When you make an omelette many things go into … Read More

When he says ‘I am outta here’
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Amanda couldn’t believe what she was hearing. How could Greg be asking her for a divorce when all these years she had tolerated his bad behaviour? He was leaving her for the mother of his child, the one whose adultery Amanda had tolerated for the last 5 years. Unbeknownst to her he had continued seeing the lady and now Greg was saying he needed to be with her, given that their third child was on the way. She felt like … Read More

Marriage Counsellor or Divorce Court; which comes first?
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Many people remain in an unhappy marriage for reasons ranging from the children, to the fact that God hates divorce. Others say they do not mind being separated, presumably because God didn’t talk about being separated!!!! Usually living together or apart he truth is that both are not happy at the state of the marriage and excuse their refusal to get divorced on reasons give about, among others. They do not voice their unhappiness to each other, even though the … Read More

Infidelity – The place adultery starts
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She came out from under the staircase, out into the hall. The light, the air-conditioned hallway, the freshness of the environment momentarily ran into her head. She rests her body on the counter slightly hiding herself behind the pillar which went up into the ceiling. She was probably aware of her sweaty smell and needed to cool down and dry out before walking further into the hall. The hall was almost bereft of bank customers, it had been a long … Read More

What Is No Fault Divorce?
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It’s getting fashionable to talk about no fault divorces and telling couples to choose a no-faults divorce over a contested divorce. Emotions run deep when a marriage breaks up and it is hard to counsel no-fault. What is a No-Fault divorce? It is meant to be one where the couple agree to divorce without ascribing blame on each other. Is this possible or is this a fallacy? Divorce is a commonplace event; yet it leads to the greatest emotional trauma … Read More

Divorce is never the first option
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  Divorce is not necessarily the first option in a troubled marriage; but needless to say that some are terminal and we need to put an end to them. Just like any event,  divorce needs to be considered and planned. The only time that I say run from your marriage is when there is physical and emotional abuse. Run, run, run and don’t stop to say hello to anyone until you are in court. If the issues that make you … Read More

Has your marriage broken down irretrievably???
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The law regulating divorce and other causes between a couple that got married under the Marriage Act is known as Matrimonial Causes Act (MCA). It is only relevant to marriages conducted as court or church marriages. The only reason recognised under MCA is that the marriage has broken down irretrievably. There are however some facts recognised by law by which a marriage can be said to have broken down irretrievably. 1. The respondent has wilfully and persistently refused to consummate … Read More